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Another Realm This forum is designed for those exploring alternative sexual practices and lifestyles. Whether a seasoned veteran of this scene, a newbie, or simply interested in broadening your sexual horizons, we hope you'll find the content of this forum stimulating and informative.

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Old 11-28-2018, 03:49 PM   #31
Heiny
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Fetlife has a lot of guys who do not understand the role and responsibility of being a Dom. Communication and setting boundaries are the key.

A good Dom gets in the head of their sub - Discovers what pushes them. Its not just tying someone up and spanking them...although it can be. If you really want to experience it, you have to accept that the sub has all of the real power and the Dom has only the power the sub allocates to them and only for as long as the sub wants the Dom to have the power.

As a sub, if you truly surrender your power to the Dom you can have a completely liberating experience.
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Old 11-28-2018, 04:46 PM   #32
stavinChain
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Heiny View Post
Fetlife has a lot of guys who do not understand the role and responsibility of being a Dom. Communication and setting boundaries are the key.

A good Dom gets in the head of their sub - Discovers what pushes them. Its not just tying someone up and spanking them...although it can be. If you really want to experience it, you have to accept that the sub has all of the real power and the Dom has only the power the sub allocates to them and only for as long as the sub wants the Dom to have the power.

As a sub, if you truly surrender your power to the Dom you can have a completely liberating experience.
THIS
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Old 11-29-2018, 06:44 PM   #33
GoAheadMkMyDay
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Heiny View Post
Fetlife has a lot of guys who do not understand the role and responsibility of being a Dom. Communication and setting boundaries are the key.

A good Dom gets in the head of their sub - Discovers what pushes them. Its not just tying someone up and spanking them...although it can be. If you really want to experience it, you have to accept that the sub has all of the real power and the Dom has only the power the sub allocates to them and only for as long as the sub wants the Dom to have the power.

As a sub, if you truly surrender your power to the Dom you can have a completely liberating experience.
Ditto. And what OldRichWhiteGuy said. And it gets expensive and VERY time consuming. Good toys and equipment are not easy to find (really specialty items) and not easy to hide. Bondage, spanking, teasing, and all sorts of kinks and fetishes should NEVER be rushed.

As the sub, do you think you want to be dominated for 30m? 60m? I have had a couple of relationships of this type (including a current SB) and I NEVER spend less than 2 hours with her and usually 3-4 or more if I can. Some time before, lots of play time, but lots of after time, too. As wild and willing as most subs in my experience are, most also actually want a feeling of safety and security. They want to give up everything (at least for that period of time to you). Any real Dom knows there is a lot of RESPONSIBILITY that goes along with the gift of her submission. Its a whole 'nother level of intimacy.

Now add that up from a guy's perspective. Finding someone that will admit she likes it and likes the same things you do. Making a connection. Building the trust. Per hour appointments for 3-4 hours each. Time away from the RW responsibilities. It just adds up very fast. Oh, a renting a real dungeon/play world as well, if you want to do it right. Almost as much as the ladies time.

In a perfect world, I'd build a dungeon (multiple rooms) with all sorts of different things to play with, and ... well, let you imagination run away with itself.

I love all you ladies that like this stuff. You're such interesting people.
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Old 11-29-2018, 07:19 PM   #34
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Amiliah Rayne, I agree with you about that. It's rare when I find a gentleman who understands my submissive side.

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Originally Posted by Amiliah Rayne View Post
I don't think it's very popular period but I could be wrong
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Old 11-30-2018, 10:21 AM   #35
Amiliah Rayne
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Originally Posted by papadee View Post
I just think it's less applicable to the hobby than outside the hobby. Do you, as a provider, really want to give up that much control to strangers? And does the Dom want to pay someone to dominate? Right there is a loss of control.
I'm not worried about my safety because everyone knows Dorthy Will Throat Punch You Into The Middle Of Next Week If You Try Anything..

But this is where I'm confused you're asking me if I'm willing to give up control to strangers but yet men give up total control when they go see a Dom so what's the difference?

Men pay to get dominated because it's a fantasy or something they enjoy so why couldn't it be the other way around? Maybe I'm missing something
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Old 11-30-2018, 10:22 AM   #36
Amiliah Rayne
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Heiny View Post
Fetlife has a lot of guys who do not understand the role and responsibility of being a Dom. Communication and setting boundaries are the key.

A good Dom gets in the head of their sub - Discovers what pushes them. Its not just tying someone up and spanking them...although it can be. If you really want to experience it, you have to accept that the sub has all of the real power and the Dom has only the power the sub allocates to them and only for as long as the sub wants the Dom to have the power.

As a sub, if you truly surrender your power to the Dom you can have a completely liberating experience.
Exactly This Is What People Don't Understand I Need To Save This..
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Old 11-30-2018, 10:27 AM   #37
Amiliah Rayne
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GoAheadMkMyDay View Post
Ditto. And what OldRichWhiteGuy said. And it gets expensive and VERY time consuming. Good toys and equipment are not easy to find (really specialty items) and not easy to hide. Bondage, spanking, teasing, and all sorts of kinks and fetishes should NEVER be rushed.

As the sub, do you think you want to be dominated for 30m? 60m? I have had a couple of relationships of this type (including a current SB) and I NEVER spend less than 2 hours with her and usually 3-4 or more if I can. Some time before, lots of play time, but lots of after time, too. As wild and willing as most subs in my experience are, most also actually want a feeling of safety and security. They want to give up everything (at least for that period of time to you). Any real Dom knows there is a lot of RESPONSIBILITY that goes along with the gift of her submission. Its a whole 'nother level of intimacy.

Now add that up from a guy's perspective. Finding someone that will admit she likes it and likes the same things you do. Making a connection. Building the trust. Per hour appointments for 3-4 hours each. Time away from the RW responsibilities. It just adds up very fast. Oh, a renting a real dungeon/play world as well, if you want to do it right. Almost as much as the ladies time.

In a perfect world, I'd build a dungeon (multiple rooms) with all sorts of different things to play with, and ... well, let you imagination run away with itself.

I love all you ladies that like this stuff. You're such interesting people.
But like I've said before guys get dominated for 30/60min I just don't understand how this is so different!

Me pegging a guys ass while he is tied up or me getting face fucked while hog tied and spanked they'res NO DIFFERENCE!

If someone had something that really just clicked I'm sure things could be worked out! Those who charge more for real fetish stuff are crazy !
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Old 11-30-2018, 10:29 AM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by naughtyangel4u View Post
Amiliah Rayne, I agree with you about that. It's rare when I find a gentleman who understands my submissive side.
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Old 11-30-2018, 04:10 PM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amiliah Rayne View Post
But like I've said before guys get dominated for 30/60min I just don't understand how this is so different!

Me pegging a guys ass while he is tied up or me getting face fucked while hog tied and spanked they'res NO DIFFERENCE!

If someone had something that really just clicked I'm sure things could be worked out! Those who charge more for real fetish stuff are crazy !
"Me pegging a guys ass while he is tied up or me getting face fucked while hog tied and spanked they'res NO DIFFERENCE!"


I suppose my question would be what turns you on more, doing the pegging or receiving the spanking? For me, whatever really gets my partner going excites me. That can be me being more on the Top role or bottom role. I am drawn to Dominant women because, at least the impression they give, they love sex and want to be there. A submissive could likewise love the sex want to be there and really get off on that experience. I have had a significant other that relished this. She loved Spank-Fuck, Throat-Fuck, push hard into the bed as I fucked her from behind, throw her around from position to position. She just loved that and, as a result, I found it exciting. On the other hand, I always enjoy a good face sitting session and would love to find a woman that brings herself to climax while pegging me.
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